The Call of the Hunt
by StellaOrbits
Summary: A young woman tells her story of taking on the life of a hunter, including her encounters with the Winchesters. Contains spanking and additional mature content. The story includes Sam, Dean, and an original character in 1st person. **I do not own Supernatural. I simply play with them**
1. Chapter 1 - How I Got Here

**I do not own Supernatural or any of the characters. I simply play with them**

Chapter 1 – How I got here

I had made somewhat of a name for myself for being a lone hunter over the years. I had tried and failed more than once to have a pack. Nothing ever stuck. It was easier to detach myself from the deaths if I wasn't around long enough to care, so I never stayed in one place long.

I still made an effort to appear normal by government standards. I owned a decent sized home. I had a job that allowed me to work remotely with flexible hours. I had loving parents and two annoying siblings that I would die for. But beyond that, there was nothing. I had been widowed shortly after getting hitched in my early twenties, and it threw my perfect life into this vortex of pain and darkness.

About ten years ago, I had no ideas monsters existed. My biggest worries in life were what carpets to pick for our new home, when we would be ready to grow our family, and what was for dinner. Little did I know that that our fairly secluded home was being watched; stalked.

One day when my husband had gone out to run some errands, I had a terrible rush of anxiety flood over me. I spent hours trying to contact him and make sure that he was fine, but by nightfall, I knew he wasn't. My husband, who was on the police force, was one of three people to go missing from our town in recent months. The others hadn't returned, and I was inconsolable when they hadn't found him within a few hours of me calling.

The town itself wasn't large, but there were lots of wooded areas. As soon as word got out that he was missing, those woods became swarmed with people searching. Within a day, word reached beyond the townspeople, and a pair of FBI agents stopped by asking questions. They were tall, good looking, and honestly seemed a little off for them to actually be FBI field agents, but I was too distraught to care.

They promised me that they would find my husband. They promised me that it would all be fine. I didn't believe them, and when they excused themselves to talk in the other room the second time they stopped by, the feeling that something was off hit me stronger than before. My curiosity started to take over.

It didn't take long before I found out their true identity. A couple of days after their arrival, I followed them deep into the forest. The machete the shorter one held cast off the light of the moon as he pulled it above his head. I screamed when the head that rolled towards me represented a twisted version of the man who had been my husband.

I dropped down to my knees and screamed. When the men tried to comfort me, I punched and kicked in every direction, desperately hoping to connect with flesh. Eventually, I broke down and sobbed, gripping onto the shorter one and crying into his chest. He held me tight and tried to console me.

"Shhh. You're going to be safe now. You're safe. Sammy, take care if this will ya?" he said, addressing the other man at the end.

At some point, I fell asleep as I had been crying into his chest. I woke up to the sun shining on my face. I quickly adjusted my eyes to the space around me and realized I was in my bedroom. For a brief moment I allowed myself to believe that it had all just been a terrible dream, but when I looked down at the dirt stained jeans I still wore, I realized it wasn't.

I started to cry again, screaming out in pain at my loss. Within seconds, the taller man came running into my room, machete wielded. I instantly filled with rage.

"YOU DID THIS!" I shouted, throwing myself from the bed at him.

"Whoa!" he reacted, tossing aside the weapon and squeezing me into his chest. "Calm down, Delilah. Let's just talk."

"Talk about WHAT?!" I shouted. "You murdered my husband!"

I thrashed around, trying to break free of his strong hold so that I could beat on him, but it was useless. He just pulled me closer to him as I screamed into his chest.

"We were trying to protect you!" he replied with desperation.

I twisted myself slightly and threw my head back wailing. I threw a couple of punches at him, connecting one with his chest.

"Sammy! Let her go!" a demanding voice came from behind him.

I was instantly released and immediately wanted to be back in the comfort of his arms. My fury had been replaced with an overwhelming sadness and loneliness. I just wanted to feel connection to something. I couldn't make sense of what I had seen, and I didn't know how to ask for answers.

I dropped to my knees and sobbed into my hands. I felt a gentle hand on my back and just allowed it to calm me. I didn't know what else to do, and I wasn't going to get anywhere if I wasn't calm enough to ask for answers. As my tears started to die down, I melted into the floor, hugging my knees into my chest as I lie on my side. The man with the long hair sat close to me with his ankles crossed. He continued to rub his hand in small circles on my back, soothing me.

"Who are you?" I eventually managed to ask.

"We're hunters," a voice said from behind me.

I jumped slightly when he spoke but turned my head to see "not Sammy" sitting behind me on the edge of my bed. His face looked hard at first glance, but something about his face was gentle.

"Like… bears?" I asked, blinking tears out of my eyes.

Both men laughed.

"No," Sammy replied gently. "We hunt monsters and the like. We try to keep everyone safe from things like what happened to your husband, but sometimes we don't make it in time. I'm truly sorry for your loss. I wish it hadn't ended that way."

"What if I hadn't seen you kill him? What would you have told me? Would you have just let me think he was still missing? How do I know he couldn't be cured? Maybe he was just sick," I paused for a brief moment. "No. I saw the look in his eyes. What happened to him? What was that? He wasn't my Charlie," I quickly added.

"My brother and I, Dean and I, we typically try to keep humans in the dark about the truth as much as possible. It doesn't help you to have to live in fear of wondering if another monster is waiting around the corner. Your husband had been turned into a vampire. One came here to try and build a pack. The seclusion of the area provided for an easy target. That's where the missing people have gone from your town… plus a few from some outside towns. If you hadn't seen us killing him, we might have told you there had been some sort of accident and that his body had been burned. Or we might have just told you that we were unable to find him. It's really not easy to cover these things up, but I think most people are so distraught that they just accept what we tell them without making a big story out of it that they go and tell all of their friends. Usually, though, we opt for the truth. I think it's harder not knowing what happened to your loved ones," Sammy replied.

"Brother?" I asked, sitting up and looking between them.

Sammy laughed.

"Yes. I'm Sam Winchester. That's my older brother, Dean."

I scooted away from Sam and leaned my back against the wall as I hugged my knees. Sam frowned at me but didn't say anything. I looked between the two a few times before speaking again.

"Are there monsters everywhere?" I asked.

"Monsters. Demons. Witches. Ghosts. Angels. You name it," Dean chimed in.

"Angels?" I asked, intrigued by the idea.

"Angels are dicks," Dean said gruffly, crossing his arms.

I laughed at his response. It was a lot to take in, but it all made sense the longer I let it settle. Thinking that it was just humans and animals on earth attacking things was probably crazier than thinking magic and good and evil were all tangible things. For some reason, knowing that gave me a sense of relief. Sam had been right. Knowing what happened to Charlie instead of being left to wonder if he had left me was better no matter how much his death stung. And now I had an entirely new view of what was out there. I wanted to find a way to be a part of that world.

"Can I be a hunter?" I finally asked after a long silence.

"What? Why?" Dean snapped back, uncrossing his arms and leaning towards me.

"Delilah," Sam cut in before I could talk. "This life is not one we would wish upon anyone who has the choice. We were thrust into it, and no matter how many times we try to leave it… Well, our path is a little different than most, but sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if it was all different. I know from experience that if you get into this for revenge, you'll probably be trapped in it for a lot longer than you intend. Besides, there is no revenge to be had in your situation, and it doesn't make sense to throw away what you've got. I understand that sometimes it feels like it's the only way, but it looks like you can still build a great life. You have a beautiful home, you seem to be intelligent and put together—"

"And you're not rough on the eyes," Dean cut in with a wink causing me to blush.

"Come on, man," Sam said.

"What!" Dean innocently shouted.

"She just watched you behead her husband. Can you not?" he retorted.

"Fine. Sorry," Dean said with what seemed like a sincere apology to me.

"I want to hunt. I want to know more about your world. How can I train? Where do I find information? How can I help? Do you have a secret lair somewhere? How many of you are there?" I asked, ignoring their banter.

"Look, doll," Dean started as he stood up. "Being a hunter takes a lot of work and sacrifice. It won't just be your husband that you lose. Anyone you care about will be at risk. I wouldn't change anything that led me to where I am today, but I also wouldn't wish it up on anyone else."

I stood up quickly and took a step towards him.

"Listen, _baby cakes,_ I don't think it's your choice. If you guys won't help me, I promise I will find my own way."

Dean looked taken aback by my sudden change in demeanor. Good. It would prove to him how little he actually knew about me. I had always been strong and independent. Charlie had respected that. He had understood what I needed. He had been so perfect for my life, and now I had lost that.

With a quick recovery, Dean stepped over to me and looked down. My breath hitched as I allowed myself to really see him for the first time. His face attempted to mask a deep pain, but he was incredibly handsome despite it all. His body commanded my attention, and I was riddled with guilt as my thoughts went down an impure path so soon after losing the love of my life.

"Get one thing straight. If we let you train with us, I'm the one in charge. We don't have time to dick around with power moves. If you do something stupid, I'll whip your ass and we'll move on. Simple as that. Got it?" Dean growled at me.

I flushed when he spoke. I knew he had a soft side from the way he held me in the woods, which was nice, but the command in his voice made me crave this opportunity even more. Knowing that there was some structure amongst the chaos of life kept me from spiraling. Charlie and I had worked that into our bedroom play, but I burned to know what type of punishment Dean would dole out.

"Fine," I replied as bratty as possible. "When do we start."


	2. Chapter 2 - The First Few Weeks

Chapter 2 – The First Few Weeks

The brothers spent the next few weeks at my house. Sam continued to argue my becoming a hunter, while Dean continued to try and get me to cave and change my mind. The puppy dog pleading from Sam probably would have eventually caused me to give in… At least long enough for him to leave so that I could train on my own. But Dean… Dean brought out my stubborn side. As long as he kept trying to passive aggressively get me to fail, I would do everything in my power to not. It was just part of who I was, but it was also the perfect distraction after losing my husband.

Needless to say, the drive of the whole situation kept tensions high. Dean and I were constantly at each other's throats, and a part of me wanted to push him to see if he really meant what he said. By the end of the third week, I finally found how well Dean stuck to his word.

We had been training in the backyard with hand on hand combat. He wanted to practice the same move we had been going over again and again; I wanted to try something more advanced. It quickly turned into a shouting match which resulted in me throwing myself at him. As we tumbled to the ground, he easily maneuvered us.

Faster than I could process, he was on one knee, with me draped over the other leg with his foot firmly planted in the ground. With one arm wrapped tightly around my waist, trapping me against his body, the free arm rained down a fury of painful swats on my upturned ass. I froze at first, not believing that he had actually followed through.

As the pain started to register, I squirmed. The stubborn part of me desperately wanted to get away, but the other part… No. I had to fight him off. I got my answer. Dean was true to his word, and there was something in that alone that made me trust him fully from that moment on. I stopped squirming, taking a moment to absorb the pain that was taking over my backside, then planted my feet and twisted, loosening his grip just enough so that I could escape.

I rolled and came to standing, taking a few extra steps away as I rubbed my ass. We both remained silent aside from the heavy breathing. The intense stare that held between us made my breath catch. He slowly came to standing, looking like he was about to tackle me again, but instead I ran to him and pressed my lips against his own. At first, his whole body tensed with surprise, but he quickly recovered and returned the kiss with as much intensity as my own mouth pressed into his. I moaned when he ran his hands along my body.

Then he pulled away. Without a word, he turned and went inside. I stood there feeling like a complete piece of shit. What had I been thinking? When I heard the Impala start up, I sighed and decided to continue my physical training alone. I needed to burn off some of the sexual tension anyway, and I wasn't ready for any questions Sam might have if I went inside. The sting in my ass kept fueling the fire in my loins for longer than I would have liked, but it made me train harder than I had any other time the last three weeks.

After a couple of hours at it alone, Sam finally made his way outside.

"Hey," he hesitated. "Is everything alright? Dean took off in a hurry and wouldn't say anything. I heard you guys fighting…"

I sighed loudly, hoping he had been listening to music or something to drown out the noise.

"I don't know. I pushed him pretty far this time," I said blushing.

"Yeah," he cleared his throat, "I, uh, heard. Usually he waits until he's calmed down a bit before doling out any kind of punishment… I guess you really pissed him off, huh?" he finished with an awkward laugh.

"Haha, yeah. I guess I did," I replied, shifting awkwardly.

"OK. Well. I'm gonna go give him a call. I hope he didn't go too hard on you," he said with a gentle smile as he squeezed my shoulder.

I laughed more heartily.

"No. I escaped his hold before any real damage could be done. I'm sure I deserve way worse than what he gave me, anyway."

Sam frowned at me and walked away with the phone to his ear.

I flushed at the thought of Dean punishing me again. I could feel my wetness growing as I imagined being over his knee. Luckily, Sam's diverted attention saved me from any embarrassment as I shivered with delight. I walked quickly by him, desperate to get to the privacy of the shower. Clearly training wasn't going to be enough to relieve my tension.

As soon as I got into the house, I was running up the stairs. I started ripping my clothes off before the bedroom door had even closed fully. I ran over to the drawer and grabbed my vibrator before heading to the en suite. Turning on the water, I climbed in the shower before the water had fully warmed and let the shock of the cold water focus my attention for a brief moment.

After my short reprieve, I pressed one hand to the wall and barely made contact with my throbbing loins before I was coming hard. My shaky legs failed to support my body when I was done, so I dropped to my knees and began to cry. I realized in that moment that I had been using my training to not deal with my husband's death. Sam had been partially right about me not doing this. I needed to take some time for myself, but then I would jump into this with everything that I had.

I finished my shower and laid down for a quick nap. When I woke up, it was almost dark outside. My stomach rumbled as it reminded me I hadn't eaten since that morning. I sighed and groggily rolled off the bed. When I made my way downstairs, Sam had just finished setting out the plates.

"Oh, good. You're awake. I was just going to come up to get you," he said.

"Thanks. It smells delicious," I smiled at him.

I glanced over at Dean who sat in front of his empty plate, staring at it like it would jump up and bite him if he turned away.

"Dean—" I started.

"Smells good, Sammy. What's the holdup?" Dean asked, completely ignoring me.

"You're perfectly capable of serving yourself," Sam snapped back.

"Bitch," Dean mumbled.

"Jerk," Sam retorted.

I grabbed my plate and waited for Dean to serve himself, standing quietly by the entrance of the dining space. I caught Sam glancing with a worried frown, but quickly looked away anytime I caught his eye. I really didn't want to talk about anything in front of him. I had a few things to say to Dean before I could have a chat with Sam.

Dinner was quiet. Any attempt at the start of a conversation died almost immediately as it was met with one-word responses. Surprisingly enough, I was the first one to finish, despite my slow eating. The tension by the end of the meal was almost unbearable. I stood and started doing the dishes without a word. When I had finished the bulk of them, I turned around to find Sam sitting alone.

"He's mad at himself, you know. Not you," Sam said quietly.

"Where did he go?" I asked.

"Front porch," he said. "I don't know if he'll talk to you, but I think it's worth a try."

"Thanks, Sam. I need to talk to him either way."

"Of course," he said hugging me tightly. "Go. I'll finish up the dishes.

I nodded and made my way out. I found Dean sitting in one of the rocking chairs drinking whisky. I couldn't help but smile at him. I wished I could redo the last three weeks, but it was already done. It was time to move on.

"Mind if I join you?" I asked gently.

He frowned but didn't protest, so I sat down.

"Dean, I—"

"I'm sorry, Delilah. I had no right to hit you when I was angry," he said before I could even speak.

He set his whisky down and rubbed his hands over his face before turning to me.

"You've got a real knack for getting under my skin, you know that?" he said.

I laughed.

"Yeah, I've been told I'm pretty good at that. And I maybe was kind of trying to do it on purpose a little?" I said trying to make it sound like a question.

His face hardened for a moment, and then he shook his head.

"I should have known you were pulling that crap. You didn't seem like the type to be that annoying all the time," he said with a miniscule smile.

"I think part of me thought it would help me forget about what happened to Charlie," I started. "If I just jumped full force into training… If I pushed you enough to see if you would actually whip my ass… I thought it would help me forget him, but what happened earlier—It made me realize that I need to deal with it. I need to finish planning the funeral. I need to respond to all the phone calls and letters. I need to tell my family."

"So, you're finally going to admit that you shouldn't be a hunter then, eh?" Dean said, trying to make a joke out it.

"NO!" I shouted back too quickly. "Sorry. I just mean that I agree that I may have rushed into this. I don't agree that it's not something I should be doing. And I'm sorry for kissing you," I added. "I kind of got swept up in the moment."

Dean sighed.

"I figured you did. That's why I broke away. I didn't want you to regret it when you were more clearheaded, and honestly, I thought you were going to punch me," he laughed.

"I don't regret it. I'm attracted to you, and while I need time to actually heal from this, I wouldn't change how it happened," I hesitated for the next part. "And if… you wanted to finish my punishment properly… I think it might actually help both of us. But I think after that, it's probably best for you and Sam to get back to your lives. If you want to keep in touch, I would love to have that as an option, but I don't want to keep holding you hostage."

I shifted uncomfortably as I waited for his reply. He nodded slowly, but didn't speak for what felt like forever.

"You're not holding us hostage, you know. We're enjoying our time here. We can stay and help with funeral arrangements if you'd like," he added gently. "I think we'll be fine with whatever you decide you need. As for punishing you… I really don't think that's necessary. If you were going to keep hunting with us, yeah. I'd probably take my belt to you," he stopped and looked up at me when I inhaled sharply. "Oooorr, maybe I'll just take my belt to you as a reminder to not do anything stupid after we leave…" he said slowly, watching me intently.

My heartrate and breath had both greatly increased. I wanted to tell him how much I needed that. How much the discipline kept me focused. I held my wide eyes on him, and he reached out and grabbed my wrist. When I didn't resist him, he pulled me behind him back inside.

"You guys alright?" Sam asked when we passed through the house.

"Fine, Sammy. Turn up the sound," he responded, referring to the TV.

Without saying anything, Sam reached for the remote, turning up the sound. I looked back at him, and he stared at me hard. I just smiled and nodded my head, and he seemed to be ok with that. I was glad he understood what was happening. I was sure he had been on the receiving end of Dean's wrath more than once. I quickly wondered if Sam ever returned the favor, letting my eyes travel to Dean's ass.

When we reached my bedroom, my breath caught in my throat. He was really going to do this. I couldn't help but smile. When Charlie and I had worked spanking into our bedroom play, he never pushed me far. I tried to be patient. I figured we would have years ahead of us to work into that. I briefly wondered if this was more than I thought that I wanted.

Dean released my wrist and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Lose the pants," he said, watching me.

I blushed deeply. After my shower, I had thrown on sweats with nothing underneath. I wasn't sure that I was willing to fully expose myself like that to him.

"Um, can you just slide them down once I'm in position?" I asked timidly. "I'm not wearing anything else."

"Oh," he said rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. "Yeah, sure. Lie over my lap, and we'll get started."

I nodded, trying to convince my body to disconnect this experience from sex. It wasn't working. I made my way towards him, desperately hoping that he wouldn't see how wet I was.

"Today," he said with some annoyance.

I took one large step and let myself topple over his legs. I let out a huff of air then shifted slightly to get more comfortable. When I felt him reach for the elastic of my pants, I lifted my hips. As soon as I was exposed to the cool air, I could feel that the tops of my legs were wet, too. There was no way he didn't see it. He quickly confirmed my suspicions when he let his fingers gently trace over the curves of my ass. I shivered and couldn't help the groan that escaped my lips when he brought down that first slap.

He grunted quietly but made no other comments about my response. He started off slow, taking time to let the sting of each smack sink in fully before moving on to the next one. I could feel myself getting more wet as the sting slowly built, and I released a frustrated exhale at his slow pace.

"Do you know why we're here?" he eventually asked, emphasizing his question with three hard smacks to my sit spots.

"Because I've been bratty. I haven't followed your direction. I've done everything I can to fight back, and –" I inhaled sharply and moaned when he brought down a series of harder slaps. "AND I WANTED THIS!" I shouted, unable to stop myself.

"Fuck," he whispered as I felt him harden into my side.

After that, he let loose. There was no more extra pause between his hand raining down on me. My body vibrated with pleasure as the tears started to form. I forced my body to stay in the position as it begged for me to take Dean. I was so wet that it was starting to drip from my leg onto his pants. When he moved down to the tops of my thighs, I couldn't help but grind on him, desperate for my clit to have some contact.

He immediately stopped, lifting my hips from contacting his erection. He was breathing heavily, and I was crying softly. I wanted both the release from the spanking and from reaching orgasm so badly that it was physically hurting me. He took the opportunity he had of me being raised up to try and undo his belt, but he was struggling with the angle I was still pressed into him.

"Let me," I said, pushing up and letting myself find contact with his leg again.

My eyes rolled back in my head as I let the pleasure of contact to my swollen lips fill me. With a quick breath, I snapped open my eyes again and quickly undid his belt. As I pulled it through the loops of his jeans, I shivered at the sound. I went to toss it aside, but he grabbed my wrist stopping me.

"Uh uh. Back over. We're finishing up what I promised," he said to me in a sultry tone.

I couldn't help myself as I pressed my lips to his again, forcing my tongue into his mouth. This time, he allowed himself to give in more. He roughly grabbed my ass, reigniting the sting that had started to dull. I pulled away gasping, groaning in pleasure. He licked up my collarbone, dragging his teeth over my neck, then yanked me back over his lap. My complaint left my lips as soon as I felt how hard he had gotten. It was almost painful in my side, but he quickly readjusted, sticking my ass higher in the air.

"Ready?" he asked in a much gentler tone.

"Please!" was all I could manage in response.

"Okay. You're getting ten. Count them," he said with a hardened voice.

THWACK

"Oh GOD! ONE!" I shouted.

The sting was everything I knew I was missing from when Charlie and I would play. I felt my eyes tear up again from the pain.

THWACK

"Fuck! TWOOO!" I screamed.

THWACK

"TH-Threee," I cried out when he left less time between.

THWACK

"F-Fuh-Foouuurr," I finally broke down crying.

THWACK

"Fiiiive," I squeaked out.

THWACK

"Six," I said quietly, my body falling limply over him.

THWACK

"Seven!" I half shouted as he moved lower on my ass, causing my lips to twitch.

THWACK

"EIGHT!" I yelled, feeling my body come close to orgasming.

THWACK

"NIIIINNNE!" I tensed up, trying to delay my release.

THWACK

"FUCK, OH FUCK! TEN! FUCK! YES!" I let my body go.

I was practically convulsing as I came. Dean tossed the belt aside, rubbing his hand over my ass.

"Need you—," I huffed. "Need you in me," I finished breathlessly.

He stood and scooped me up into his arms in one motion. After gently laying me on the bed, he tore his clothes from his body. At the same time, I limply tried to remove my own shirt. He sat over me, assisting me, smirking slightly as my breasts were exposed. I lifted my hips to his swollen cock, trying to guide him to me. I shouted in pleasure as he easily slid in, immediately finding my G Spot. He wasted no time moving slowly. He simply rammed himself into me until I came again moments later.

After that, we shifted in and out of multiple positions. The stamina that he had was incredibly impressive, and each time I thought I had nothing left, he built me up to wanting more again. When my body had been completely drained of life and fluids, he finally let himself find a release. We collapsed down on the bed together, heaving. I looked over to him with a smile, and he gently kissed me.

"Thank you," I whispered before letting sleep consume me.


	3. Chapter 3 - Saying Goodbye

Chapter 3 – Saying Goodbye

When I woke the next morning, I was naked on top of my sheets with a blanket draped over me. The bed next to me was empty but still slightly warm to the touch. I smiled to myself at the thought that Dean had stayed with me throughout the night. When I sat up, I winced slightly at the dull ache in my ass. I sighed at everything I had planned to do that day. It was time for me to let the boys go.

I groaned and rolled out of bed, the soreness from the previous day's activities had taken over my body. I slowly made my way over to the bathroom, yawning and carefully stretching. I pushed myself to move faster, craving the heat of the water on my stiff muscles. I turned on the water and turned around, catching a glimpse of the damage done to my ass.

I gently ran my fingertips over the dark red and purple splotches that covered my ass. I could feel the raises in my skin where the belt had made the most contact. I pressed into my flesh and flinched slightly at the pain it brought back to the surface. Recovering, I pressed again, desperate to feel the effect the belt had left.

"Admiring my handiwork?" a voice said from the door causing me to jump and squeal.

"Oh, hey. Yeah, I uh. Was just making sure you didn't do any last damage," I tried to reply coolly.

Dean laughed at my failed attempt at some sort of swagger.

"Uh huh. I can put something on that when you get out of the shower if you'd like. It will help with the bruising. I hope that it's just your pale skin making it look way worse than it actually feels," he said with concern.

"I'm fine, Dean. I promise. It may be a little less than comfortable to sit for the day or two, but there is nothing that you did to my ass that is worse than injuries I obtained doing training with you," I assured him.

"Alright," Dean replied gruffly. "I'll be out here when you finish. Don't be too long, Sam made breakfast," he finished with a wink.

"I can make no promises," I replied as my stomach growled loudly.

"If you say so," he said with a smirk.

I smiled coyly at him then jumped in the shower, turning up the heat so that it burned my flesh. The heat felt good on my muscles, and the steam filled my sinuses and lungs. I caught myself rushing a few times, then stopped to breathe. I didn't want him to know how desperate I was to get out of the shower so that he could touch me again.

I turned the shower off and was met with a towel being offered to me. For some reason being naked at that moment made me feel very exposed. I blushed and took the towel, covering myself.

"Thank you," I said.

"Come lay on the bed. Let's take care of that ass before we get some grub," he said taking my hand.

He had placed two pillows in the center of the bed, perfect for me to lay over and present my ass (and other things) to him. I laughed gently before opening the towel and dragging it up my back with a shimmy. I turned my body slightly before bending forward and bringing the towel to my hair, taking care to stick my ass out towards him. I let out a squeak when he gave me a light smack, then flipped my head back up.

"Bed," he said, pointing.

I sighed.

"Fine."

I quickly placed myself over the pillows, wiggling a few times before finding a comfortable place to rest. I gasped a moment later when the cool gel met my skin. I was covered in goosebumps not only from the temperature of it but from Dean's touch.

"Is this alright?" he asked gently.

I replied with a moan, trying not to focus on how wet I was growing. I did everything I could to focus on anything besides his touch, but my breath was ragged, and my loins betrayed me. When his hands were done caressing my ass, his fingers made their way to my clit. I relaxed into him, relishing his touch at that moment. His fingers worked quickly with an expert touch, bringing me to orgasm again.

"Dean," I squeaked breathlessly.

He chuckled lightly at me then patted my ass.

"I'll meet you downstairs. Don't want breakfast getting cold," he said.

I turned slightly and watched him walking to the bathroom to wash his hands. I less than gracefully rolled myself from the pillows, landing roughly on my ass. I quickly sucked air through my teeth.

"You good?" Dean asked.

"Fine," I replied with little emotion, trying not to show how the pain actually affected me.

I sighed quietly, thinking about how uncomfortable breakfast was going to be if I kept getting turned on by the pain in my ass. Dean staring at me with a worried look wasn't helping, either. Seeing how much he actually cared was not only making putting clothes on difficult, but it was going to make telling them it was time for them to go nearly impossible.

"You need help?" he asked with a crooked smile.

I jumped as I glanced down to see him now standing by my feet.

"No, no. I'll be down in a moment."

"Alright," Dean replied, his eyes tracing along my body.

I shivered. Watching him enjoy all of me was way sexier than I could handle at that moment. When I saw him start to step forward, I grabbed a pillow and chucked it at his face.

"Go! I'll meet you downstairs," I half shouted while laughing.

He had caught the pillow and pulled it down to smirk at me.

"You might want to wash your pillowcase," he said as he gently tossed it back.

I groaned at the giant wet spot, quickly removing the pillowcase to prevent any more of my juices leaking into the actual pillow. When I looked back up, Dean was gone. I relaxed fully for a moment, taking a complete inventory of how I felt. When the sadness started to take over the bliss, I rolled off the bed and got dressed.

When I arrived downstairs, the brothers were already bickering about something. I saw a plate set up for me, along with a plush pillow on the hard, wooden chair. I blushed at it. Assuming that Sam knew what happened and having hard evidence that it happened were so different. Sam caught my eye a moment later and smiled at me, stopping whatever he had been saying to Dean.

"Delilah! Sorry if your food is cold. I can heat it up if you need," he said.

"I'm sure it's fine just the way it is. Thank you for making it. Everything smells delicious," I replied.

I sat gingerly and looked down at the spread. It looked like an omelet with avocado, bacon, salsa, and cheese. Some toast. Hash browns. A cup of coffee. And a glass of orange juice. The sadness of telling them goodbye started to build up again as I looked over my food and up at them. Sam caught the pain in my face and instantly commented.

"Are you ok?" he asked, quickly coming to my side.

"I'm fine, but if you don't mind, can we all sit down and talk while I eat?" I asked.

Both boys frowned at me but quietly sat. I exhaled sharply, taking a few bites before starting to talk.

"Mmm, this is delicious, Sam. Thank you," I said before taking a few more large bites.

"You're welcome," he said with a quick smile.

I sighed again, wiping my mouth after taking a gulp of coffee.

"I just—I need you both to know how much these last few weeks have meant to me. I have learned so much from you both, and having the distraction was what I needed to process Charlie's death. But I think we all know that it's gotten to the point of me just burying my emotions. I still need to tell our families and have a proper funeral for him. I need to say goodbye to my old life if I really want to successfully follow through with the life of a hunter—"

"Delilah, you don't—" Sam interrupted.

"No, Sam. I do. I can't go back to what it was before. Charlie has been my life for a long time. All of the plans I had for my future included him. What is there to go back to now?" I mostly asked myself.

"You have the potential to be whatever you want, but you still have a family out there. How would they feel if you just disappeared with no trace?" Sam finished.

"Well, I was hoping that maybe you guys could help with that… Before you leave, can I give you their information? Then you can let them know if something does happen to me."

"And when are you trying to kick us out?" Dean asked

"I'm not trying to kick you out, Dean. I just need you to get back to your life while I finish up some of the things in mine. I'll probably try to have the funeral next Saturday. That gives our families enough time to travel here. So… I guess if you want to stay another almost two weeks… you can. But I really think you should just get back to things for you," I said, hoping both that they would argue to stay but also just leave.

The boys sat quietly for a moment before Dean spoke again.

"Let me go talk with Sammy real quick. We'll be back shortly," he said with little emotion.

"Ok," I said, not knowing how to take that.

I watched them walk outside together, then tried to strain to listen for a few seconds before giving up. I sighed and went back to finishing up my breakfast. It was delicious, and I really didn't want to waste it. Being left alone with my thoughts again, I questioned whether I had made the right decision. The more I thought about it, the more I knew it was right for me to say goodbye. I could train combat and fighting on my own, and if they set me up with some resources, I was more than capable enough to learn about the lore. No. I needed them to leave. This was a journey I needed to complete on my own.

"We've talked it over," Dean started, scaring me from my thoughts, "and we will leave in three days. That gives us time to make sure there isn't anything that needs to be taken care of on our way home as well as providing you with some help in preparing for the funeral."

"We both agree that it would be better to not be around for the actual funeral," Sam took over. "And I would really like to try to talk you out of being a hunter for just a little longer. But if you really won't be swayed, I want to make sure we aren't leaving you empty-handed. I can give you some numbers of a couple of people who can help get you on the hunter hotline and some good places to look up lore. Dean seems to think that you'll do fine in your combat once you've allowed yourself time to heal, so…," Sam trailed off.

"Oh, come on, Sammy. I know you've seen her fight. She's going to be more than fine," Dean snapped back.

I laughed and stood to be slightly closer to their faces.

"Thank you… I'm not going to change my mind, though I do appreciate the concern. I will also accept your help the next three days if you promise to answer any of my questions without trying to talk me out of this," I said crossing my arms.

Sam frowned at me while Dean rolled his eyes. A moment later, Dean stepped into my face.

"I will agree to that if you agree to follow my rules," he said.

"And if I don't?" I asked, my breath hitching slightly.

"I throw you over my knee," he said without missing a beat.

I shuddered slightly at the thought.

"Fine," I said, trying not to let Sam see how much I actually wanted that to happen.

"Come on, dude. We're here for three more days. There's no reason to train her like that," Sam tried to argue.

"She already agreed to it," he said with a shrug.

I laughed.

"It's fine, Sam. I'm sure I can manage to stay out of trouble for three days. Any demands you wish to make while we're here?" I asked him.

"Don't be a hunter?" Sam said with his best puppy dog eyes.

I laughed more heartily.

"Nice try. Anything else?" I said.

"I guess not," he said with a slight pout.

The rest of the day went on without much excitement. I asked multiple questions, taking notes on names, numbers, information, best hunter practices, and so on. Sam explained the best ways to create hidden compartments in my car for weapons, commenting on the fact that an SUV is great for size, but the open trunk would cause issues without some sort of cover. We finished up by building a custom cover that would allow me to easily access everything without getting arrest for keeping some of the items in there.

When it started to get dark, Dean went out to pick up some dinner while Sam helped me put together a formal announcement for a celebration of life for Charlie. We made a list of people to invite, printed out some invitations explaining that he had passed on a few weeks prior and inviting them to celebrate him, and started writing out addresses to mail them out. Dean returned with the food some time in the middle of the process and mostly helped by asking questions.

Once we had mailed off the invitations, we put on a movie. About two hours later, I woke up as Dean gently scooped me in his arms. I moaned softly and nuzzled into him. The comfort he brought me caused my heart to ache moments later when I realized this would be gone soon. I let a tear fall down my cheek as I wondered what this house would be like when it was empty.

When I sniffled, Dean looked down at me, worry painting his face. He took two large steps to my bed, and gently set me down.

"Are you alright?" he asked me, shifting the pillows around, so we were both more comfortable.

"Yeah, I am just worried that I won't be once the house is empty," I said, letting myself hear the words.

I curled myself into a ball as the pain became real. While the tears streamed down my face, Dean placed himself behind me, hugging me tight. We remained in silence as I quickly fell asleep. When I woke the next morning, I was alone again. The sun hung high in the sky telling me that I had probably missed breakfast.

I rolled out of bed and turned on the shower, hoping to loosen my stiff muscles. When I pulled back the curtain after a long shower, I found Dean standing there holding a towel for me again.

"Good morning, Sunshine. Glad to see you are alive. Sam was starting to get worried."

"Thank you," I said dryly.

Dean frowned for a moment then wrapped me in the towel and held me tightly against him. I wanted to fight, but the comfort of his arms was overpowering. After a few moments, he gave me a squeeze then kissed the top of my head.

"I'll be downstairs if you need me," he said gently.

When he left, I quickly dried off and got dressed. I stared hard at my face in the mirror. I could see the pain taking over my features. I fought it off, turning my focus to get the most of the last of my time with the boys. I shook my body, pasted a smile on my face, then made my way downstairs.

The boys seemed to understand my need to just enjoy them, so after a quick look to each other, they played along. It wasn't hard to actually be happy when I spent time with them, so I did my best to take it fully in. I spent the first half of my time training with Dean, who stopped me during one argument to say that we would be taking care of my attitude later. I caught him smirking as he walked away while I tried not to tremble. The second half of the day I spent with Sam, asking everything I could about lore and trying to keep my mind off of Dean.

After dinner and a movie, I quickly excused myself upstairs. I sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Dean to follow. I smiled when he came in shortly after. He smiled back then his expression instantly changed. My heart jumped, and I felt a tingle.

"We need to have a chat about your attitude. You keep up that kind of crap while you're on a hunt, and you're going to get yourself killed," he said crossing his arms and standing over me.

"But I—"

"No. You agreed to follow my rules or face the consequences. I can't allow you to go out and hunt if I know that you're going to have erratic behavior," he softened for a moment. "I'm serious, Delilah. You need to be careful."

"I promise to do my best to hunt smarter and be safe," I responded, standing and squeezing his arm.

He gave a small nod then quickly sat and pulled me over his lap. I went to push myself up so I could take down my pants for him when his hand came down over my jeans. I gasped in surprise then settled back down over his legs.

"I'm thinkin' you need a little bit of a warm-up today," he said, responding to my unspoken words.

He took his time covering every inch of my ass. I closed my eyes and just soaked in the pain. I wanted to accept it this time rather than fight it. I knew it would help me heal if I was able to focus on the deep emotional pain I was suffering. When I started crying only a few minutes in, he abruptly stopped.

"Delilah?" he asked with worry lacing his words.

"Please keep going. I need it," I said through quiet tears.

He waited a moment then readjusted his arm around my waist to pull me in tighter. When he started up again, his swats were unrelenting. He was no longer leaving a pause as he covered my ass with fire. I started to squirm, unable to convince my body to hold still, so he placed a leg on top of mine. After a few minutes of painful swats, he stopped, allowing me to catch my breath.

When I calmed down a bit, he spoke a gentle command.

"Lose the pants."

I pushed myself up, not caring what he saw this time as I took my pants and underwear all the way off and set them aside. I gingerly placed myself back over his lap before wiping the sweat, snot, and tears from my face with my sleeve. Once both hands were placed back onto the ground, he wrapped his arm around my waist again.

SMACK

The sting of that first swat on my bared bottom felt so much more intense than the previous time. My already tender ass wasn't prepared for the punishment that came after a warm-up. With Charlie, I had always craved the sting, so he never had me wear clothing. I knew now how effective it could be to have that. I made a mental note and tried to focus back on the pain rather than the pleasure.

He started again with a slower pace, letting the sting of each slap sink in completely. My body still reacted as it had every other time I had received any type of spanking, but this time I was feeling the punishment more than the pleasure. It took a lot out of me to not beg him to stop. I knew this was what I would need to get through everything, but the pain was almost overwhelming.

When his pace and force picked up, I screamed. I felt him tense and pause. I took a moment to collect myself so that I could try to explain why he needed to keep going.

"No. Please. Keep going," I stopped and growled in frustration. "Can't keep holding it all in. Gotta let it out."

I desperately hoped that he knew I was trying to tell him that the scream was in frustration at my own resistance. I wanted to let everything go, but it wasn't in my nature to give in. I sighed with relief when he started back in. This time when he reached the point of fighting, I held my breath. I focused in on watching Charlie die. I remembered our last goodbye. I thought about the way he held me tight and told me he loved me. I thought about his smile and his gentle touch. And then, I broke down. I started sobbing as I let the pain feed the release I needed.

This time, I didn't feel Dean pause. He kept up his rapid pace as I yelled out for Charlie. When he finally stopped his onslaught, my ass was throbbing. I could still feel guilt and pain in the pit of my stomach, and I couldn't bear for it to remain. When I went to ask him for more, I felt him shift me and undo his belt. I hugged his leg to me, trying to communicate that this was what I needed.

"I'm gonna give you ten. Is that enough?" he asked, worry lacing his voice.

I nodded quickly, never releasing my hold on his leg.

He sighed.

"Alright. I'm gonna go quick."

And he did. By the time the fifth strike fell, I was blinded by the fire of pain. I came back to with a gasp for air and felt the power behind the last two blows. As I lay over him sobbing while he rubbed my back, I finally felt lighter. I didn't berate myself for feeling the pain of the loss of my husband. I allowed myself to not be ok. Dean spoke something to me that I didn't understand and then gently helped me stand before he laid me back over the bed.

Moments later, I felt a cool gel on my ass and hissed. The sensation was overwhelming. As he continued to rub away the pain, I was overcome with fierce desire. Having suppressed my initial reaction to be turned on by the punishment, it now hit me like a wall of water. Everything I felt was immediately redirected between my legs. I started to writhe and groan, rubbing myself against the bed for some attempt at relief.

"Dean…" I said with an airy tone.

He instantly stopped rubbing my ass, so I took the opportunity to come up onto my hands and knees, presenting myself to him completely. I felt the bed shift as he left and removed his pants. A moment later he returned, gently running his fingers up my ass, catching my shirt with his thumbs and pulling it over my head. I shivered as he let his hands trace back down the sides of my body.

Moments later, I felt him enter me and I instantly filled with goosebumps from the anticipation of being able to get another release. It didn't take long before I was coming hard. He could tell that my body was spent, so he kept it short. I was grateful for how in tune he was to my needs in that moment, but I quickly fell asleep before I had a chance to tell him

The next morning, I woke and realized that it would be my last day with the boys. I took a moment to focus on what I wanted to get from the day. After a few moments, I made up my mind. I quickly got ready for the day, flying down the stairs to find the boys in the kitchen drinking coffee.

"I want to see the nest," I shouted before either of them had a chance to speak.

"You what?" Sam asked, brushing his hair from his face as if it would help him hear me better.

"The nest. Is it still there?" I asked again.

"Well, yeah. I guess for the most part," Sam said slowly.

"We didn't really do anything besides slice and burn," Dean added with a short laugh.

"Wait, but why do you need to see it?" Sam took control of the conversation again.

"I was lying in bed thinking about what the best way to spend our last day together would be, and it seems to me that the best thing is to go back out to where a monster actually set up. It could help me learn things to look for that I probably won't get from a book or you guys telling me," I quickly replied.

"Okay—" Sam started.

"Sammy, I got this. You finish making breakfast," Dean interrupted.

Sam glared at his older brother for a moment, then turned to back to the stove.

"Sit," Dean said, pulling out a chair for me next to him. "So. You're actually going to keep this up after we leave?"

"Well, yeah," I said. "I thought I made that pretty clear," shifting slightly as the hardwood brought back some of the ache to my ass.

"Saying and actually doing are two different things. As a hunter, you typically want to do what you say whenever possible because that's what will keep you alive. It will also keep whoever else you hunt with alive. Remember how it felt, the guilt nagging at you. Wondering if you could have done more for Charlie. It will be just the same if you don't hunt smart. Focus on that pain in your ass now. If I'm not around to do that, how much will that eat away at you?" he said grabbing my arm.

I blushed profusely, glancing over to see if Sam was looking at me. He wasn't. My eyes started to tear up as I let it all sink in, but nothing Dean was saying was changing my mind. This was what I wanted. I wrapped my arms tightly around Dean.

"This is what I choose," I whispered to him.

As I pulled away, he gave a tiny nod. I smiled at him as I readjusted back into my chair.

"I don't want either of you to worry about me. Everything that you have given me over the last 4 weeks is more than I could have ever expected. I will continue to do my best not only to not blemish your name but to hunt the way it was meant to be. I know that I will struggle to not blame myself when something goes wrong, but I'm sure I can find ways to take care of that guilt. Even if that means stopping by for a visit," I said with a wink.

"I can't say I like it, but you seem to have thought this out well beyond a gut reaction. So, I will agree to do what I can to assist you," Sam said, setting a plate of food in front of me.

Dean nodded in agreement, his eyes growing large with excitement as he saw the spread in front of him. Sam and I both laughed at him. The rest of the day was filled with laughter, more information, some bickering, and lots of silence. By the time night rolled around, my chest ached. I knew that goodbye was coming soon.

"Delilah," Sam started, "I want to wish you the best in this. Please don't hesitate to call us if you need anything. Are you sure you don't want us to stay for the funeral?" he asked.

"I'm sure," I said giving him a smile and a tight hug. "Are you sure you guys have to head out tonight?" I asked.

"Yeah. I drive better in the darkness anyway," Dean replied with a wink.

I separate myself from Sam and threw my body into Dean. I would miss him more than I was willing to admit. I wished that we had gotten one more night together, but they had gotten called onto a case. Who was I to ask them to stay after knowing this life?

"Alright, well if you find that you need somewhere to crash when you're done, my house is always open to you," I said, stretching up to kiss his cheek.

"We appreciate it," Sam said with a smile.

And then I watched them walk out the door.


	4. Chapter 4 - Reunited

Chapter 4 – Reunited

After the boys left that day, they checked in pretty frequently for the first few months. I was eager to prepare myself for the life of a hunter, so I stayed exceptionally busy. After the funeral for Charlie, my parents had tried to stay with me, but I convinced everyone that getting away on my own was the best way for me to heal. Traveling had made it easier to dodge Sam and Dean trying to check in on me while also allowing me to meet other hunters and learn an insane amount about everything.

The pattern easily stuck. Run to a location. Spend a few months with a group. Learn all that I could. Move on. Avoid staying in one place too long. A few times I stuck around for a while, but anytime we lost someone, I'd lose it. The pain of the loss was too much. I blamed myself and was unable to move on from the blame.

I realized how much I needed the release of punishment. Pain. I tried purposely getting a little beat up during hunts, but it wasn't the same. So when I hung around some hunters a little longer, I tried to ask for them to relieve me from my guilt. Sometimes they would, other times they wouldn't, but it would never free me as much as Dean had.

A couple of years after I first met the boys, I had stayed in one place long enough for them to cross my path. There had been talk about a monster that had been terrorizing the same town for hundreds of years. The patterns had never made sense until now, and every hunter wanted to come get a piece of it.

When I saw Sam and Dean pull up to the same location as me, I was flushed. My body shivered as it experienced multiple emotions. I was excited and anxious and guilty, but the yearning I had, that won over. Not only did my heart crave for their kindness, but my body so badly craved for the reprieve that I knew Dean could give me.

"Delilah!" Sam shouted as soon as he spotted me.

I smiled and waved, trying to hide my discomfort. I couldn't help but laugh as Sam ran over and hugged me, but it didn't take long to notice Dean's cold hello. I ignored it and gave him a stiff squeeze.

"How have you been? Haven't heard from you in a while," Sam continued.

"Oh, you know…. Just going around…. Hunting," I replied with an awkward smile.

"Yeah, good. It's been a while," Sam went on in an overly happy tone.

"I guess it has," I replied with little emotion, trying to shift to hide the discomfort I felt as Dean glared at me.

"How have you been?" Sam pushed once more.

"Fine, Sam. Thank you," I snapped, watching Dean glare into the distance.

"Alright, well. I—" Sam started.

"Cut the crap, you two. We've got a monster to hunt," Dean snapped.

The hunters I had been with for a few months tried desperately to find something to stay busy. Everyone knew who the Winchesters were. And I had never talked about knowing them to anyone. I wasn't about to waste time explaining anything to them now when I knew there'd be plenty of questions later.

"Fine. Lead the way," I finally replied to fill the silence.

Everyone shrugged and followed quietly. Like we had grown accustomed to doing, the hunters I was with split off into two groups, coming in from two sides. I caught Dean glance over at my directive to move, and saw him nod to Sam to take a different path than us. I sighed quietly to myself.

I knew that I had hurt him. He tried so many times to stay in touch after they left, and I did everything I could to avoid him. I couldn't admit how much I needed him if I was going to hunt on my own. Sam had always just accepted that I was too busy, but Dean… Well. After he had called me one night and I had snapped at him, he knew that I wasn't just busy.

Seeing him now only made me feel worse. I spent so much time trying to get him out of my life only to try and replace him with every other person I met. Suffice it to say, I was more than distracted as this hunt went on. I immediately got knocked out while not paying attention, waking up who knows how long after to Dean holding my head.

I groaned and tried to get away from him.

"Stay," he said, flexing against me to hold me down.

"Deaaaaaan," I tried to whine.

"Sammy, I'm gonna take Delilah back to the hotel and check out her injuries. Can you finish up?"

"Sure," Sam replied with a quick glance to me.

"Come on, Dean. I can take care of it myself. We have everything we need," I tried to convince him.

"Clearly not everything," he said under his breath.

I rolled my eyes but let him guide me up. I desperately tried to hide the excitement filling me from having him back with me, but I also confirmed that I had made the right choice by avoiding them while on a hunt. The distraction was just too much. When we got to the Impala, I was filled with dread. I had seriously put myself in danger during a hunt, and he had witnessed it all. My ass was toast.

"Dean, I--," I tried to start.

"Probably best to not talk right now, Delilah," he replied curtly.

"Mark, can you and the guys help Sam cleanup? I'll be back later for our debrief," I called out to one of the hunters that had followed us out with as steady of a voice as I could.

"Wouldn't count on that," Dean mumbled.

"I didn't say later when," I replied through gritted teeth while holding a smile for Mark.

"Sure. I'll be in touch with you," Mark said as he frowned and then went back inside.

As soon as Mark turned around, Dean opened the Impala door and gently guided me in. I could hear his teeth grind as he crossed in front of me to buckle my seatbelt. I held my breath and closed my eyes, trying to distract myself from him by figuring out exactly what I had injured. A scrape on my elbow. A bump on my head that I wasn't willing to find out if it was bleeding just yet. What felt like was the start of a bruise on my knee. And probably a sprained ankle.

"Hey!" Dean shouted at me, causing my body to jerk. "I need you to stay awake. You probably have a concussion."

"Oh, sorry. I wasn't trying to sleep, I just—"

"I don't care. Stay awake now," he cut me off.

My body tingled with embarrassment and oozed with guilt. I didn't feel tired. Maybe a little dizzy, but I didn't have the desire to sleep. I didn't know what I could say to him that wouldn't piss him off more, so I started simple.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"You will be," he snapped back.

We went back to sitting in silence. I didn't want to look at him. I couldn't trust myself to not break down and say something stupid. A few minutes later, we turned off the road to a motel. He drove to the further room and shut off the car, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before getting out. I quickly unbuckled myself and exited right as he got to my side. I flashed a smile at him but was met with only a deepening frown.

This time I sighed.

He led me into his room and sat me in a chair by the window.

"Stay," he said as he went to grab a bag from the car.

I took the brief moment alone to check if my head was bleeding. I brought back my fingers and they were dry. I let out a breath of relief and quickly dropped my hand down when I heard Dean coming back.

"Let me see your elbow," he said holding out an ice pack to me. "Put this on your head."

I rotated to give him my arm and saw the dried blood down my forearm. Without saying a word, he sat across from me and started to clean my wound while I held the icepack to my head. The sting of the alcohol distracted me from the throbbing behind the ice. Dean then pulled out some tweezers and put them next to my elbow.

"You've got a pretty nasty splinter. This will probably be uncomfortable," he said.

I nodded.

When he grabbed the wood with the tweezers, I tensed. He paused a moment for me to relax, then slowly started to pull. I could feel movement much further up the back of my arm than I would have liked, but nothing seemed to be snagging on its way out. After what felt like forever, Dean finally got the last of it out. The wood was a good six inches long. He quickly set it down and put pressure on the entry point. Grabbing some gauze, he removed the tissue he had been pressing to my arm and replaced it. He had it taped on a few minutes later, making sure to seal all of the edges.

"Thank you," I said quietly to him.

"What else hurts?" he replied.

"Left knee. Right ankle," I said.

He grunted and nodded.

"Gonna check your eyes," he said grabbing a light.

I stared forward, letting the light blind my eyes a couple of times. After a few more sounds from Dean, he put the light down.

"Am I released then, doc?" I tried to joke.

"You don't seem to have a concussion, but I'm still not completely sold on whipping your ass right now," he replied without humor.

"Ok… well… then can we talk?" I asked meekly.

"I thought you had said everything you needed to when you so politely told me to 'fuck off' the last time we talked," he replied sarcastically.

"Dean…" I started.

"What? What more could you possibly have to say, Delilah? I told you not to get mixed up in this world, and you did anyway. More than once Sammy and I have gotten word back about you getting injured or running off or almost getting caught. Then you think it's alright to just cuss me out and ignore our messages? No. I don't have time for any more of your bullshit. I do feel obligated to put you back in line if you're going to keep this up, but I owe you nothing else."

I swallowed the tears that threatened to spill. I hadn't realized they cared so deeply after such a short time with me. They still barely even knew me, but their caring went so much deeper than I had realized.

"You're right," I whispered.

"I'm what?" he snapped back.

"I said you're right, Dean. You don't owe me anything, but I very clearly owe you and Sammy an apology."

"Damn right, you do!" he interjected.

I couldn't help but smile a little.

"The truth is, I didn't think you would remember me long after you left. I figured that you would move on and just let me live in my own chaos. I didn't realize you were keeping such close tabs on me still… I probably would have made a little more of an effort to—"

"To not get yourself almost killed?" he chimed in.

I brushed profusely.

"Yeah…. That, too. But I was going to say to be in contact with you. I wanted to not admit how much I needed you… Especially right after losing my husband, but if I'm being honest, I'm just being crushed by my guilt. I need to find a healthy way to deal with it without having to call you up to take care of things," I said.

"Ok, so come hunt with us," he suggested.

"NO!" I responded more quickly than I had meant to.

Dean looked at me with surprise.

"Alright, then don't. But don't expect us to keep saving your ass, either," he said.

"Dean… that's not… I didn't mean it that way. I just… I want to prove to myself that I can do this without you… without anyone. You know? I want to know that I am capable of being a hunter. I've been thinking about trying to hunt on my own for a while, and this seems to be a perfect opportunity."

"You sure about that?" he asked with a hint of coldness to his words.

"You saying you're not sure that you trained me properly?" I snapped back.

"Well I sure as hell didn't train you to have the bratty attitude. You learned that one all on your own."

After that, I just laughed. I wanted so badly to stay with him. He reminded me what it was like to truly be cared for. Not to say that the other hunters wouldn't learn to care for me like he had, but there was something about him that reminded me of Charlie. I was unable to let him go because of it, but I also needed to let him go because of it.

"Yeah, well. That ain't going nowhere," I said, continuing to laugh for a moment.

I stopped abruptly when he just watched me with sadness.

"What?" I asked him.

Without warning, he pulled me into a kiss. My body tensed only briefly before melting into him. His touch, his kiss, was unmatched to any other I had experienced before. Even Charlie wasn't quite up to the level that Dean was. Though now with my husband's death further behind me, I was finding Dean's kiss that much more enjoyable. I dropped the icepack that I had still been holding to my head and pushed myself into him, forcing us both to stand. As he wrapped his arms around me pulling me closer, his phone went off.

"Son of a bitch," he said as he pulled away to answer.

I swayed gently, light headed from all the blood rushing to my head. I quickly sat back down and caught Dean's glare before he answered the call.

"Sammy! What's up?"

I heard some mumbles from the other end of the call but couldn't make out any words.

"No. I want her to stay here tonight. Tell them we'll take care of her and bring her back tomorrow."

Another pause for Sam to talk which caused Dean to look over at me and frown.

"Not yet," Dean replied. Pausing for Sam to speak.

"I don't trust that she's actually as ok as she claims. I'll take care of it tomorrow before we take her back," he said.

I blushed and shifted, guessing that he had asked if Dean was going to take care of me in the way that they did so well.

"Yeah. We'll come get you and get some grub," Dean said before hanging up.

"So…" I started.

"You're staying with us tonight. I still need to remind you how stupid you've been, but seeing as how you almost passed out from a little kiss, I'd rather keep an eye on you. If getting some food improves your status, then I'll send Sammy out to run some errands. But I guess for now you just get to wait in anticipation," he finished with a smirk.

I crossed my arms and pouted at him.

"Maybe I won't be anticipating it," I shot back, sticking out my tongue.

That made him laugh and shake his head.

"Come on. Let's go get Sammy," he said holding out his hand to me.

The next few hours went along swimmingly. There was an ease to the laughter that came when I was with them, and eating had definitely improved my brain function. I half hoped that Dean wouldn't catch on, but when I got up to go to the bathroom, he followed me and scooped me up in another kiss. This time, I didn't feel faint when he finally released me.

"Mm. Thought so," he said as he swatted my ass before heading to the bathroom himself.

"Shit," I mumbled half defeated.

Dean of course beat me back to the table, and I could tell by the look on Sam's face, that things were going to be taken care of sooner rather than later. I pretended not to notice and kept a smile planted on my face as I approached them.

"Shall we?" I asked.

"Let's do this," Dean replied, while Sam gave me a quick smile.

When we got back to the motel, the Impala was still the only one in the parking lot aside from the person working the front desk. I let out a breath of relief then got out as if nothing was about to happen. I turned around to see Sam slide over to the driver's seat as Dean let himself out. I caught Sam's eye for a moment and gave him a nod and a smile. He returned the gesture, then sped away.

"You comin?" Dean asked holding the door open for me.

"Do I have a choice?" I replied with a sigh.

"Not a chance," he shot back.

When we both got inside, Dean slid one of the armless chairs away from the table.

"Sit," he directed.

I half ran by him, trying to sit before he got a swat in. I failed. Once I was sitting, he massaged the back of his neck for a moment.

"I'm not really sure where to start with this, Delilah. You made a promise to keep yourself safe, but what I've been hearing and what I just saw back there…. You looked like someone who didn't know how to even throw a punch."

"I'm sorry… I guess… Well, I know I was distracted by you being there. It threw me off."

"I get that, but having me there or not, you can't let yourself be so easily distracted. What even got you that distracted that you couldn't even see something coming at you from that far away?" he asked.

"This," I whispered.

"This what?" he asked, clearly confused.

"Knowing that you were around and could punish me properly unlike everyone else had failed to do," I said quietly.

"Everyone else?" he asked with a hint of hurt in his voice.

"Well… yeah. While I was busy avoiding you, I got close enough to a couple of hunters to ask if they would be willing to keep up your methods of clearing my guilt. Probably would have been better off paying a professional," I finished in a mumble.

Dean frowned a moment before laughing heartily.

"You're telling me no one you've come across was able to turn your ass red enough to get you to shape up?"

I jutted my chin out.

"Maybe you're just better at it than you give yourself credit for," I replied, trying to throw him off with the compliment.

He laughed heartily.

"What am I going to do with you…" he said mostly to himself.

"Spank me?" I replied with a grin.

"Well, there's no question in that, but what about when we're gone again? Are you going to keep pulling stupid crap?" he asked sternly.

I say quietly for a moment. I couldn't decide how much I wanted to tell him for what my next plans were. I was going to start hunting alone, especially after finding out they had been spying on me. I didn't want the distractions of other people getting hurt anymore, and I had only been half kidding about hiring someone to relieve me of any guilt while silencing my stubborn side.

"I can't promise that I won't ever do anything stupid, but I do plan to take some steps to decrease the chances of that happening," I said, trying to tell him enough without saying too much.

"Why not just come back with us? Or go back to your home? Why the running from place to place?" he asked gently.

"Dean… I really just can't yet. There's still too much that I haven't worked through in order for me to hunt with you guys. And home… still hurts. I can't let it go, but I can't stay there in the quiet for too long."

"So get a dog," Dean cut in.

I laughed.

"No. I'll be fine. I'll keep figuring things out, and eventually I'll cross paths with you guys again."

"Do you want us to stop trying to contact you?" he asked with some hurt in his eyes.

"I don't know… Maybe? Let's see how we feel in the morning to decide that," I asked, trying to not show the ache I already felt thinking about being away from him again.

"Ok," Dean replied softly. "I guess we should move on to your punishment, then. I'm not really sure what stupid things to base it on now that I know you were trying to take care of some of it without me…" he trailed off.

"I'm going to assume there's probably things you didn't know about," I started, laughing uncomfortably. "So maybe we can just have a word for me to let you know I am to my limit?" I finished with a question.

Dean frowned then nodded.

"Alright. I guess I can agree to that. What's your word?"

"Pineapples?" I suggested.

He laughed.

"Ok. I was honestly a little worried you'd pick something that you might say normally…"

"How do you know I don't?" I asked sarcastically.

"I guess I don't, but I'm gonna stop when you say it. So… use it wisely."

"I will," I replied quietly.

"Alright, let's get this over with," he said, motioning me out of the chair so he could sit.

"Dean?" I started when I was standing with him.

"Yeah?" he asked gruffly.

"Thank you… for everything. I mean, keeping an eye on me and stuff. It means a lot to me."

"Er, yeah. Of course," he replied, rubbing his neck.

I smiled and kissed him gently on the cheek before he sat down. I took a moment to remove my shoes before laying myself across his lap and placing my face against his leg. I shut my eyes and took a deep breath, both dreading and relishing the moment.

"Your ankle is swollen," Dean said pulling me out of my head.

"Yeah…" was all I could manage to say.

He replied with a grunt and mumbled something about ice before landing the first swat.

SMACK

I shivered as the initial sting travelled through my body. I tried to focus in on what he was able to do differently from the others.

SMACK SMACK

He landed two more, and I moaned with delight. My loins craved for his touch as I grew wet.

He continued at a slow pace for a while, my breath continuing to grow ragged as I denied my body any reprieve. I was worried that if I let go that I would completely lose control. When he started increasing the speed and intensity, my body tensed even more. My muscles shook with fatigue as they begged me to let go.

"Delilah…" Dean started.

"I CAN'T!" I shouted at him as I finally broke down in tears.

As I released my body limply over his lap, he rained down a flurry of swats. I let the sting absorb deep into my skin. A few moments later, he stopped, rubbing my throbbing backside and letting me catch my breath. Once I had calmed down enough, he spoke again.

"Up," he directed.

I stood and removed my pants and underwear, wiping my face. The emptiness that filled me while I was away from his touch scared me, so I quickly placed myself back over him. I hugged his leg into my body and let him adjust my hips.

"Delilah?"

"I'm alright, keep going," I pleaded with a shaky voice.

I heard him sigh gently before the first smack fell.

This time, he changed up his pattern. Instead of starting off slowly, he just gave his all. Within a few minutes, I was crying out for him to stop, but I hadn't used my safe word. Then his pace slowed down, and he done something he hadn't done before, he spoke to me.

"Delilah, tell me why you're being punished," he commanded, emphasizing his words with smacks to my sits bones.

"Keep puttin m'self 'n unnecessary danger!" I cried out through my sobs.

"And why do you find this form of punishment so effective?" he asked more gently, still emphasizing his words.

"Helps release. Guilt. Pain. So heavy. Makes me light," I said more calmly despite the burn in my ass.

He was helping me focus on what it was that I was trying to get from this. His kindness made me cry harder, but it was a release for the emotional pain I was harboring instead of just the guilt I always put on myself. He picked up the pace again when I no longer had the energy to hug myself to his leg. After I have no idea how long, he slowed to a stop.

"Almost done. 15 with my belt, and then it's all forgiven. You can let everything go," he said.

"K," I managed to squeak out.

I forced my muscles to work enough to lift my hips so that he could undo his belt, promptly collapsing as soon as he had gotten it off.

He barely waited for me to get settled again before he brought down the belt.

WHAP

The first one fell and he gave a long pause before continuing, but I barely reacted. The next ones came without rest.

I lost count by the 7th one, gritting my teeth to stop myself from yelling out my safe word. But soon, it was too much for me. I had reached my limit.

"PINEAPPLES!" I shouted, not realizing that he had already stopped.

He tossed the belt aside and pulled me into a hug as we both stood.

"Shhh. No need for pineapples. You made it through. Just let it out now. Let it out," he said as he squeezed me in tight.

I clung to him like my life depended on it, shaking as the tears continued to fall from my face. Eventually, enough feeling returned that I experienced the burn that had taken over my ass and tried to rub it out furiously.

Dean chuckled lightly then scooped me up and went to the bed. He pulled back the sheets, and I whined, expecting him to just leave me there. He gently placed me on the bed, and then climbed in next to me after removing his boots.

As soon as he laid down, I planted my lips onto his. I felt him smile before returning my kiss. Like the previous times, the sex was amazing, and without the guilt of my husband dying, I was able to fully enjoy it. My body was completely spent when we finished, and I was drenched in sweat. I desperately wanted to shower, but I wasn't sure I could stand long enough to complete the task.

"Shall we rinse off?" Dean asked as if he could read my mind.

I laughed heartily.

"I really want to say yes, but I don't know if I can hold myself up long for that," I replied.

"I can help," he said with a wink.

So I let him take control yet again. I didn't put forth any more effort than was absolutely necessary. When we finished, he dried me off, then left for a moment. When he returned, he had my shirt and his pajamas.

"You can wear these tonight. I'll be fine in my boxers," he smirked.

"Mmhmm," was all I could manage.

"I'm gonna go call Sammy and let him know it's safe to come back."

"Alright," I replied with a yawn as I pulled my shirt over my head.

As he stepped to the table to grab his phone, I groggily put my discarded clothes into a pile with my shoes then made my way to the bed. I gingerly climbed in and let sleep consume me.


	5. Chapter 5 - Passing the Time

Chapter 5 – Passing the Time

When I woke that next morning, I chatted with Sam about keeping in touch more, but asked him not to keep spying on me. He seemed a little embarrassed by my having to ask that, but was receptive to the idea.

Saying goodbye was harder than I had hoped it would be, but I was determined to learn to hunt on my own… even if it meant letting someone I had fallen in love with go. I convinced myself it was for the best… for all of us.

When they dropped me back off with Mark and the rest of them, I was swarmed with questions. While most of them only seemed interested in my answers, Mark watched my subtle movements to shift from the pain that resided in my ass. He had been one of the people I had trusted enough to let punish me, but he had been too gentle for it to work.

Eventually, the excitement died down, and I was left alone with Mark.

"So, you, uh, let him, uh, do… the thing, then?" he asked awkwardly.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. The fact that he couldn't even say the words further proved why he wasn't the right man for the job.

"Yes, Mark. I let him punish me," I said matter-of-factly.

"Oh. You gonna go back with them?" he asked.

"No," I said, speaking again quickly when I saw his face light up. "But… I'm also probably not going to stay with you guys much longer, either."

"Oh," he said again.

"Listen. You're all great, but I have some things I need to work through on my own. I turned down their offer, too, you know. I'm not just ditching out on you to go follow them later on. I think I need to go back home for a bit and figure some stuff out before I go out and hunt again. I can't keep running," I said, surprising myself with the decision of going back home.

But as I let the words I spoke sink in, it was really the only thing that made sense. I needed to go back home. I needed to find the closure I was running away from. I sighed quietly.

"When're you planning on leaving? You don't need to run off. I could probably learn to take care of you better," Mark said.

"At least not until we've had our official debrief," I replied with a wink. "But I think it's best for me to leave. This is for me."

And we did just that shortly after. I ended up staying for about two more weeks with that group. Mark mostly kept his distance and sulked, but I wasn't going to change for him. So after a hunt debrief one night, I announced that I would be leaving. I thanked everyone for everything they had given me and promised to stay in touch.

Mark disappeared until I was packing up the last of my things. He stood by my car with his hands shoved deep into his pockets.

"You sure you gotta go?" he asked.

"Positive. It's just something I need to do," I replied, tossing my bag in the car.

When I turned around to say goodbye, he pulled me into a kiss. While I knew that Mark was handsome, I had seen him more like a brother, so my body tensed at his touch. When I didn't return the kiss, he pulled away and wiped his face.

"Sorry… just thought I'd take one more shot at seeing if you'd stay," he said hiding his face away.

"Oh, Mark…" I said, pulling him in for a tight hug. "I hope you know that I care for you. I just need to put myself first this time."

"Yeah, sure," he said as he pulled away. "I guess you gotta do what you gotta do. Take care of yourself, Delilah. Don't be afraid to give a shout if you're ever close by."

"I won't," I said, smiling at him.

"Drive safe," he replied, slamming my door as I got in.

I reacted slightly to the force behind him closing it, but brushed it aside. I started the car and rolled down the window.

"You've got a lot to give, Mark. Don't let it go to waste," I said just before driving off.

So, I went off on my own. Everything I did just felt like I was passing the time to get to the next moment. I ended up taking my time heading back home. My body had started to go numb again, and I was struggling to get back to the determination of healing my old life. After two months of wandering and a few solo hunts, I finally made it back home.

The dark house felt more empty than usual. Having been in either a car, small room, or motel for so long, it was unnerving to have so much space. In spite of my constant avoidance of family and friends, they had continued to take care of my home. I glanced over at the clock and saw that it was just after 2am. I sighed the made my way upstairs to my room.

When I looked at the empty bed, I tried to fill myself with the good memories. It didn't take long for me to start crying. The house that was supposed to have been a home had become an empty vessel of memories. I spent the next couple of years building new memories there. I threw parties, had friends and family come over often, and only went on hunts when they weren't more than a day's drive away.

I kept my promise to the boys (and Mark), and kept in touch. All of them seemed pleased that I had made the decision to keep the hunting to a minimum…. Which I had… for the most part. Instead, I started training in different ways. I started taking classes for different studies for self-defense. I was determined to train my body to react on its own, whether I was focused or not.

Once I felt ready, I started expanding my hunting territory again. When I would leave for long periods of time, I would let people know and have them watch my house. I had started my own business so I could say that I was travelling for work without having to explain myself. Eventually, I made my way out to hunt with Mark and the rest of them a few times, which led to Mark and I starting an off and on-again relationship (for lack of a better word). He kept trying to make it more, and I think I just wanted to not feel lonely. He was just pushy enough to keep me around for good chunks of time.

We kept up whatever the hell it was that we had there each time I was around, which got awkward when I ran into the boys again somewhere around 6 years after the first time I had met them. This time they had a tagalong whom they introduced as Castiel. They looked worn down, and Dean awkwardly kept his distance when Mark immediately came up and kissed me, acting like he hadn't seen them there. I tensed but did my best not to make more of a scene than that. Kissing wasn't one of the things that Mark and I did often. It was mostly just sex, which, yes, included his almost decent spanking sessions.

When Dean, Sam, and Castiel went off to check something out, I grabbed Mark's arm, pulling him back.

"What the hell, Mark," I mostly whispered to him.

"I just wanted to make sure Dean knew that I had things under control," he said with disdain.

I groaned in frustration.

"You don't own me, Mark. And I would appreciate it if you'd back off," I growled at him.

"Look, honey. I'm the one who's been taking care of you while Dean is off running around causing trouble."

I turned and punched him square in the face.

"How DARE you. How fucking dare you," I started, shoving him backwards.

"How dare I?! What about all the games you've played? Hm? Always coming back to me for more. Begging me to take care of you," he shouted back, holding his bleeding nose.

"Begging you?! No. That was not me begging you for anything but a hopeful release from your lackluster punishment. I take care of me. You're just there," I screamed and shoved him hard, causing him to fall. "You know, when we first met, I thought you were a good guy. Sensitive, but good. Now I can see that you're just a manipulative prick. I've questioned some of the things you've done over the years, but I always, ALWAYS gave you the benefit of the doubt. I can't believe I let myself fall into your charms!"

As my anger and frustration took over, my eyes filled with tears, when I turned to storm off, I crashed into someone. As soon as the arms were around me, I knew it was Dean.

"Sammy?" was all that he said before releasing one arm so he could guide me to sit on a nearby rock.

"I'm sorry, Dean!" I cried.

"Shhh, there's nothing to be sorry for. I'm sorry that I let my jealousy get in the way of being a friend to you," he said gently.

I immediately started laughing.

"And here I thought the next time you saw me you'd be impressed with how far I've come. Instead, I get to just be a blubbering mess as I realize I've been letting some idiot take advantage of me. Fuck."

"Yeah, well that's why it's Sammy taking care of him and not me. He wouldn't be able to walk once I was done with him," he growled.

I wiped my face and rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, I had to hold myself back, too. But I have to take part of the blame in that whole situation. I'm the one who eventually gave in to him… and kept coming back," I said with a frown.

"No, he should have respected your wishes to not pursue anything beyond a friendship," he replied matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, I guess you're right… again," I said with a sigh.

As soon as the situation was taken care of (Mark and the demon that brought the boys there), they took off pretty quick. Sam and Dean both tried again to get me to come with them, but I convinced that once again that I would be fine. As I waved them away, I quickly went to grab my things and go. The other hunters tried to apologize, but their words fell on deaf ears. I could no longer trust them.

That one moment alone ripped away most of the trust that I had for hunters, so I vowed only to hunt alone. I delved into the harder cases, trying to find patterns long before they were there. I spent more time at home, honing in on different skills. I started engineering my own devices to track and catch different monsters. I tried working on different concoctions and spells to reverse some of the effects of being possessed or turned.

I was becoming an expert in as many parts of the hunt as I possibly could, and I wasn't half bad. As more time passed, some other hunters heard about my work and started coming to me for things to assist in their hunts. I agreed to it most times, meeting them somewhere nearby, but never allowing anyone into my home. I set up traps and cameras for anyone trying to sneak around, but anyone just trying to come up to the front door would be safe unless I decided otherwise.

Eventually, after a few more years, the boys heard about my new operation. They were in the area and wanted to come by. My heart still fluttered at the thought of Dean coming to see me, so I agreed to it, wondering if this would be the last time.


	6. Chapter 6 - We Meet Again

Chapter 6 – We Meet Again 

It had now been ten years since my first encounter with the boys. I had grown in ways that I would have never expected, and they had seemed to harden and soften all at once. I awaited their arrival, trying to keep busy but instead finding my excitement distracting me from staying on any one task. They called and said they were a few hours away, and it only decreased my ability to focus.

Eventually, I gave up trying to do anything and just put on a movie. Before I knew it, I was waking up to the doorbell going off. I jerked awake, instinctively reaching for a gun. As my mind adjusted to where I was, I let the gun drop next to me, keeping my finger at the ready. When I got close enough to the door, I peaked through the peephole and let out a breath I hadn't realized that I was holding.

I quickly put the safety on and tucked the gun in my belt before opening the door. I was greeted by the smiling faces of Sam and Dean. This time there were no hard feelings. We had been in regular contact, and to their knowledge, I had been staying out of trouble…. Which was… mostly true. 

My heart stuttered when Dean took me into his arms for a tight hug. We had grown close as friends over the last couple of years, and I thought it might take away some of the sexual draw that I had towards him but it hadn't. Now more than ever, I wanted to stay with him. He knew who I was as a person now, and I knew what he was willing to share. But having him physically there to hold… I started to cry.

The loneliness that I had been feeling in this life of a hunter had worn on me. I wasn't aware of how much until they were there. I had done such a good job creating this new life for myself, but I missed having someone to share it with every night. I missed the comfort of someone's touch. I missed feeling wanted. 

"Delilah?" Dean asked with worry.

"I'm ok," I sniffled. "Promise. It's just been so long since anyone has held me this way…" I faded off.

"I'm gonna go setup my room," Sam quickly said, practically running out.

I laughed as I pulled away to wipe my tears.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd have that affect on me," I half cried half laughed.

"Don't be sorry. Just blame on your time of the month… or something," he finished with an innocent smile.

"Well, it's not… so I won't. I'm allowed to feel things!" I said with more aggression than intended.

"Whoa! Slow down, there!" he started, holding his hands up.

I blushed.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to say that with so much anger. I guess I'm still a little touchy about accepting my own feelings as valid," I cleared my throat. "Anyway..."

Dean laughed heartily and pulled me back in to another tight hug.

"Don't pretend to be anything you're not. I know you, and that's the you I want."

My whole body reacted to his words. I had a hard time focusing exactly on which emotion I wanted to allow to take the lead, so instead I pulled him in for a kiss. All sense of decency was instantly forgotten in that moment. I reached for Dean's belt as he forced me towards the stairs. I just barely got it off and was tossing it across the room before he scooped me up and ran up the stairs.

I desperately started removing my clothing as soon as he set me down, but he grabbed my wrist to stop me after my pants were off.

"What's the rush?" he asked with a smile.

"Wha-… Well, I…. Um. It's been a long time?" I replied, not quite catching what he meant to do.

"Aw, come on, now. It hasn't been that long."

Still confused, I let him lead me over to the bed. As soon as he sat on the edge, I knew what he had been hinting at. I blushed that it had taken me that long to realize he still meant to include the punishment.

"Oh," I said as I toppled over his lap.

"Anything you wish to share? Or shall we just leave that for tomorrow after we've rested?" he asked knowingly.

Not wanting to give away any information that he hadn't found out, I answered quickly.

"Tomorrow!" I half shouted.

I felt him laugh and hid my face in his leg.

"Alright, but don't think I'll allow things to be put off so long next time. Besides, you threw my belt at the bottom of the stairs," he practically purred.

I giggled in response, unable to form any words while I waited in anticipation for his hand to make contact with my thinly clad ass. He took his time, tracing his fingers up the back of my bare legs, causing me to shiver. When he reached my ass, his fingers slipped between my legs for a brief moment before he squeezed hard.

I let out a gasp but did my best to hold still and just soak in his touch.

His hand continued to alternate between tracing circles and squeezing my flesh. My body begged for any sort of release. When I finally let out a whimper, he brought is hand down. Hard.

I shuddered as the ripple travelled through my entire body.

When I settled back over his legs, he brought his hand down again. 

"Fuck. Please, Dean. Please!" I tried to form a coherent sentence, but it felt like I was going to explode if something didn't happen soon.

He wrapped his free arm around my waist and pulled me in close, his erection practically bruising my side. Then he rained down with unrelenting swats. I instantly started to wiggle, not used to his skilled hand. I had tried hiring a professional a few times in his absence, but there was something that without the connection for sex that didn't fulfill my needs. 

I had gone almost two years without an effective punishment and even longer without sex. I had gotten along just fine until Dean arrived, or so I told myself. Now it was a struggle to let him go through with the spanking. I started to cry as I felt my juices dripping down my leg. A moment later, Dean was rubbing my overexcited clit, and quickly brought me to an orgasm. 

Without missing a beat, he went back into peppering my ass. With the small release, I was able to relax again, absorbing the pain that he provided. After some time, he stopped, rubbing circles on my ass as he let me calm down.

"Do you want to go on?" he asked gently.

"Please," I sniffled.

He slid off the last of the protection, revealing my glowing globes. The cool air that kissed my skin for a brief moment made me shiver. I wiggled around a bit, shaking my underwear all the way down my legs and heard Dean snicker.

Again, he traced up the back of my legs, letting his fingernails lightly trace over the sensitive skin of my ass. I huffed in frustration before letting out a whimper. He complied and brought down his hand.

I arched back in pain from the force of the slap. He wasn't holding anything back, and I wasn't going to stop him. I could feel myself resisting the release, causing my body to tremble. I tensed and held my breath, fighting Dean's unrelenting hand. I was close to letting go, I could feel it. My resolve wearing down quickly. 

Sweat started to form across my hairline, making a slow trail to join my tears. My ragged breath forced its way through my clenched teeth. I growled, fighting against my body begging me to just let go. Dean brought his hand down, this time leaving it connected to my flesh. He let his fingers slip between my thighs for a brief moment, causing my wall to fall. The moment the tension left my body completely, he moved to punishing the tops of my thighs.

I lay over his legs and let myself cry. My body became numb, and I didn't notice when Dean had stopped. Eventually, I calmed enough to realize he was simply rubbing his hand up and down my spine. When my hiccups settled to gentle sobs, he finally spoke.

"Can you stand?" he asked gently.

I sniffled and nodded, attempting to push myself to standing. My shaky legs struggled to support me for the brief moment while Dean quickly stood and scooped me into his arms. I wrapped my arms around him and just lay my head into his chest. He carried me over to the bed, gently placing me down. 

I winced as the feeling in my body started to return, fighting the sleep that was threatening to pull me down. I let my body extend fully, using my limited energy to remove my shirt and bra as Dean removed his shoes and pants. I closed my eyes for a moment, focusing on the burn in my flesh. My skin covered in goosebumps when I felt Dean's breath lightly kiss my skin.

I moaned and allowed my eyes to flutter open. Dean was stripped down to his boxer-briefs. When I took in a sharp breath, he glanced over to me and smiled. I desperately tried to will my body to reach out to him. As I flexed my muscles and moved to sit up, Dean reached out to wrap his arms around me. I let myself sink into his touch and lazily rolled into him, placing my leg on top of him.

His hand started to lightly trace my flesh, sparking a flame within me that reignited my energy. As my breath increased, his touch became more aggressive. As he let his palm rest on my ass, I held my breath, waiting for his next move. After what felt like forever, I finally wiggled, pressed myself into his hand. He snickered at me before squeezing and continuing to run his hand over my leg, catching my knee and pulling me on top of him.

I brushed my hair to one side, looking down at him. My heart fluttered. I realized that I was nervous because how close we had grown from a distance. The previous times together had been a lot of sexual attraction without much background of each other. There was a trust and understanding between us, but neither of us knew the details of the life we'd lived. Luckily, Dean's attention to the details of my needs still held true.

He moved slowly, letting his hands and lips trace my skin. I settled back onto his hips and allowed myself to just enjoy his touch. As he got harder beneath me, I sat up to remove his underwear and guide him inside of me. I shivered when he shifted slightly and hit my g-spot. Before I orgasmed, he shifted again, rotating our position.

I hugged myself against his body, reveling in the touch of our flesh. As I dragged my nails along his back, a low growl left his throat. The rest became a blur of pleasure and pleasurably pain as he alternated between ramming into me, gently caressing me, and slapping my ass. By the time we finished, I was completely drained. The next thing I remembered was waking up to the sun shining down on me. 

Dean's arms were still wrapped around me, and I didn't want to leave, but the warm sun was starting to make me sweat. I carefully lifted his arm from me and slid out, quietly making my way to the shower. He groaned softly, but didn't wake. When the shower was warm, I jumped in, my stomach growling loudly. I finished rinsing off and pulled back the curtain, greeted once again with Dean holding the towel open for me. 

He was already fully dressed, though his hair was a bit of a mess. Wrapping me tightly in the towel, he kissed the top of my head. I leaned myself into him, never wanting this to end. 

"Dean?" I started.

"Yeah?" he asked gently.

"Does the offer to come hunt with you guys still stand?" I said.

He pulled me away, frowning as he looked into my eyes.

"What about everything you've created here for all the other hunters? Are you willing to let that go?"

I paused for a moment, thinking about everything my home had transformed into.

"Well, I can bring most of it with me if you've got room."

"We've got plenty of room," he interjected.

I smiled at him.

"As for the rest…. Maybe it's time to let it go," I said, looking around the space.

"Why not keep it as a place to crash?" he replied.

I shrugged.

"I dunno. I could. Maybe clean it up and rent it out. Or just have it as a safe place for hunters to stay as they pass through."

"You sure that's something you want? To let this go?" he asked again.

I thought only for a moment. 

"I'm sure," I replied.

"Alright, doll. If you say so. But might I suggest that maybe you try out hunting with us for a bit before you just jump in with both feet?"

"Ok. I guess I can agree to that," I said, trying to stretch up to give him a kiss.

He bent down to close the gap that still remained, then released his hold on me.

"Well, you wanna tell Sammy the news, or shall I?" he said with a smirk.

"I'll tell him," I started, my stomach rumbling loudly again. "Maybe over breakfast?" I finished with a smile.

"Sure thing. I'll see if he's got something started. See you down there."

And as I watched him walk through the door, I smiled broadly. This was the first decision I was making in a long time that felt like it was actually for me and not to please everyone else or clear up something from the past. This was going to be exactly what I needed, and I couldn't wait for it to start.


End file.
